Comments (4)

By Pete, May 6, 2010 2:06 pm

Yesterday, I formally resigned from my position as an Equities Trader at Kershner Trading Group. While I think those who know me well were not, at all, surprised about this decision, I feel like I should take this opportunity to reflect on the last 5 years and address some of the questions I’ve been asked by different people.

The Decision to Move On
The seed for this decision really has been planted since the very beginning. When I accepted this position before my graduation in 2004, I knew that my success as a trader was anything but guaranteed. But as a kid that just graduated from college and not having a whole lot to lose (family of my own, kids, financial obligations, etc.), I knew I couldn’t pass up the opportunity at this exciting position.

This is what I looked at for 5 years...

I promised myself before actually starting that I was going to give it a year and everything I have and see where it would lead me. As I soon found out after obtaining all my licenses and started trading actual shares (and losing real money), this was going to be a lot harder than I originally thought. It wasn’t until the end of that very first year that I started seeing success in trading.

In the spring of 2007, after almost 2 years on the job, I had my first serious thought/struggle about the viability of this position for myself. I’ve always thought that as long as I was making money, I would be very happy with this job. And even though my trading was continuing to improve and evolve with the market, I found that even as I started seeing more success, I was still struggling in finding joy in what I do.

I vividly remember how unsatisfied I felt one afternoon after a very successful trading day. I think it was mostly because I realized that my job didn’t make a product that helped anyone nor did I perform a service that helped anyone – The only thing that I did was sucked cold, hard cash out of the market (which really is exactly what a short term trader is supposed to do). The truth of the matter is that there are not many jobs out there that offers more freedom with your time, more autonomy, and more potential reward than the life of a trader. But, to me, the cost of all of those things come at the price of a job that is inherently very unstable, selfish, and secretive by nature (I hated how sometimes I feel like I couldn’t talk to someone because I don’t want them to think that I’m trying to “steal” their strategy from them). It was around this time that I knew I did not want to be doing this in the long run. Add in how taxing the stress day after day can be, I knew it was only a matter of time before my time as a trader was up.

Despite the seed of struggle that was planted, there are only two logical explanation as to how I lasted an additional 3 years – the KTG team and the market of 2008. Not even counting the fact that I had the opportunity to work alongside with some of my best friends, the KTG team have done so much to provide opportunities for success whether by the personnel there to help us or by technological tools given to us. Without the help, encouragement, and support of so many people, I know that I would never have made it this far. And as for the market of 2008 is concerned, I’ll just say that it was a true privilege to trade in that market and I’ll leave it at that.

I was seriously contemplating walking away from trading last fall (I even had a resignation letter written out) but I felt like I still had a little bit more fuel left in the tank so I decided to press on. Eventually, my efforts to continue to evolve with the market was starting to pay off little by little. But I knew that even though I’ve won a few battles here and there – this wasn’t a war I was going to win.

In the end, when the inevitable becomes reality, I knew that the only option was to let go and move forward with my life knowing that it was the right thing for me both professionally and personally. The last 5 years with KTG have had its shares of ups and downs, but in the end, I am just grateful that I got to try this on my terms and left on good terms and without blowing up my trading account. I have learned a lot the last 5 years not only about how the market functions but also (and more importantly) how I function in the midst of stress.

So… What’s next?
Since my resignation has become official, It’s been really encouraging that a lot of people have asked me if I was going to pursue some of my passions (photography, food) as a career. But to answer the “what’re you going to do now question” in a nut shell: I don’t know yet. The only thing I know is that the future is full of possibilities. So I’m going to take some time off, do a little traveling and try to figure out along the ways which direction I want to go with in my life.

Are you going to stay in Austin?
While I’ve always perceived myself as a person who embrace change, at the same time, I also feel very conflicted about the idea of relocating just because that means that I would have to leave behind not only a city that I love, but also good friends that have been by my side through the best and worst of time. So as of right now, I’m not planning to relocate in the foreseeable future (although the foreseeable part is really not that long right now).

Where’re you traveling to?
The plan right now is that I’ll be hanging out in Austin until the 13th and then I’ll be in Dallas until the 22nd (tentative). I’ll also be visiting the Pacific Northwest from 5/26-6/1. I’ll have (almost) all the free time in the world, so if you’re up for it, let me know if you want to hang out. =)

(Bonus) Trading Stats from the past 5 years
Since you’ve made it all the way to the end, I thought I’d reward you with a glimpse of what I’ve done the last 5 years with some of the stats that I took a looked at before I resigned…

Shares Traded: 21,319,664 (not a whole lot by any means…)
Winning Percentage: 61%
Median Trade Duration: 55 seconds
Positive Days: 865
Negative Days: 324
Best Trading Day: 9/19/2008
Worst Trading Day: 12/19/2008

Comments (2)

By Pete, March 2, 2008 8:52 am

What did you want to be when you were young?? I’m sure almost everyone never dreamt of whatever they’ve become today. I know that being a trader (much less working in the financial sector) was never on my horizon until I was at least a junior in college. When I was younger, I wanted to be a railroad engineer. I’m sure had my interest in trains (I LOVED playing with trains when I was a child) not get over shadowed by my pointless dream of becoming a professional athlete after I moved to the US, I might very well be a railroad engineer today.

It’s funny how things work out. I’ve been thinking a lot (more out of random boredom than anything else) if I weren’t a trader (and also got a huge do-over in life) what I would want to be/do. So here’re a few things that’ve crossed my mind.

A musician – I remember feeling so happy when I’ve finally be liberated from the chains and shackles of the obligatory piano/violin lessons as a teenager. Now looking back, I wish I had stuck around with it. Especially, after watching all these videos on YouTube that makes me ridiculous jealous of people with musical talents.

A chef – Maybe if I had worked for a restaurant in the kitchen when I was in high school and somehow had enough courage to decide to not go to college but instead to culinary school, I’d actually have a shot at this. I have actually thought about running like a bistro type thing from my house (that I don’t yet have). It’ll be personal and the menu can be tweaked to accommodate diners personally. The only kicker is that I’d have to have the hell of a kitchen/dining room at this house of mine. My dream kitchen? Three words: Walk-in fridge.

A butcher – Ok, I’m not talking about being a butcher at today’s slaughter house and meat packing plants. I’m talking about the old school butchers that gets either a whole carcass or a big part of a carcass that they can choose to cut/package to their client’s own liking. Even though this is not a very glamourous job, I think I’d really enjoy it.

A NBA referee – I still have a shot at this, maybe. =) I actually want to get back into reffing for fun soon. We’ll see how that goes.

A writer – Not sure about freelance writing. But perhaps for a magazine or a blog?? I don’t think I’ll actually be good at writing, just as you can see that my thoughts are pretty unorganized (mostly because my thoughts jump here and there and everywhere). But I just like the thought that I could be technically “at work” at a coffee shop with my laptop. And then once I get tired of writing about something, I’d go start on my own book.

What I love about the lists that we compile as children is that (most of the time) we dream of being something not merely because of it’s monetary rewards, but because of a genuine passion. Either our hearts betrayed us or we’ve settled to the reality of things somewhere along the way of childhood and all that is left now are just traces of our childhood dreams.

I find it pretty sad that the dreams that we’ve abandoned and left behind are so far in everyone’s rear view mirror now. I wonder how many people are doing what they really love.